I've Missed You! Healing Together

We have so much to talk about...

"It's not you, it's me" Isn't that one of the most irritating things that someone could say? Like, what does that even mean? With it being Mental Health Awareness Month, I'm going to try to stay away from things that may irritate us!

But seriously, I know it's been awhile , and can I be honest? Like many of us, life has taking many turns and I am adjusting to a few new normals. Do you forgive me? I hope so because I'm not going anywhere and I love you too much to walk away :)

With that being said, expect two juicy love letters from me the first Sunday of each month and last Sunday of each month to end it with great reflection! So, lets get to it!

As we give honor to Mental Health Awareness Month. I want to reflect and give you some education, inspiration and the ability to activate one of the 6 pillars that we stand in with the "Your "P" is Powerful Movement.

"HEALING"

I've come to observe that in the African American Community we use the word "Healing" often but do we really understand what it means and what it takes to truly heal? What I do know to be true is that it is a journey, and dare I say it's a forever life journey. I want to be able to equip you with some of my basic principles for you to keep in your back pocket as you heal from the past, present or for what may come in the future.

My healing journey started back in 2013 after the last devastating relationship I would endure. Check out some of my story here, My Story

What I realized as I reflected on my journey is that my healing was actionable in nature. I didn't allow myself to stay in victim mode or complaining mode. No. It was time for me to stop allowing life to choose my outcome but instead I chose it. Are you choosing your happiness ?

Lets break down the word healing and bring it back together to truly understand what we should be doing to have ultimate healing.

Healing: The process of becoming sound or healthy again.

So I want you to understand that healing is a choice and you have to mentally and emotionally set your mind on doing the work that comes with healing. It's a ongoing process.

We have to take some time to reflect on what our healing environment has looked like. Some of us have layers of trauma built up on the inside that needs deep work. Others have lived in toxicity for so long that feeling healed is foreign and uncomfortable and one may find themselves falling back into habits that are more familiar in nature. Whatever the case may be, know that you have everything you need to see your way through this process so that you may experience an abundance of Joy, Laughter, Love, Prosperity and Freedom!

So, here is the 1st step to begin unraveling your healing journey.

Definition of Process: A series of actions or steps taken in order to achieve a particular end.

Here's an example, Lets say you just got out of a longterm relationship with someone that you loved and desired to be with for the long haul but it did not work out that way. My question to you after you spent a few days crying with ice cream and watching love stories is "What do you want to see or how do you imagine yourself at the end of this healing journey?" Do you want to rebuild your confidence? Love again? Trust again? Feel a sense of peace? Whatever the outcome may be, you have to create the necessary steps to see this process through.

What do these steps look like you may ask. Lets explores a few options below.

1) Be honest with yourself about how you feel about this individual. We can't heal if we aren't vulnerable with self first. Set yourself free.

2) Begin the forgiveness process. This may take time but there are some really great books and youtube videos on the art of forgiveness

3) Create a circle of accountability partners that may serve in different capacities, some being: Your cheerleader, listener, prayer partner. Whatever you may need.

4) A morning ritual that sets your intentions on the right path toward your ultimate desires.

However you decide to begin your healing journey, all I ask is that you START. Choose your happiness proactively because no one will be able to heal you or live your life for you.

, I had so much more to share on this topic on my weekly Wifey Wednesday's on IGTV. Click here, Healing Defined to get the full video and take some time to respond in the chats, DM me or email me. I would love to hear from you!

Check out the testimonial from Sandra below:

Until next time,

E: info@shanilfarmer.com

S: @shanilrelationshipenthusiast